A message from the First Born on Mother’s Day:

“Your children sucks, but you’re a good Mom.

Love,

Your Children….

or don’t love them.

I wouldn’t.

*One of them burned my pans.”

His girlfriend’s message, on the other hand:

“Happy Mother’s Day! See you in June!”

*Note: his brother (the middle child) burned one of his beloved frying pans, and he is quite salty about it.*

This, folks, is what happens when you give birth to a smart ass.